Hello book lovers! It’s time for the book club, but let’s change it up!

Last month I picked two books, but we didn’t have nearly as much participation as the month before, and I think I know why. Two books is just way too limiting, isn’t it?  I read a few at once, and I’m a fan of quitting whenever I want. So instead of just  picking 2 books for us to read and discuss together, let’s just make this a space to talk about everything we’re reading.

I’ll share (some of) the books I read last month and the books I intend to read this month. You can share your list of books in the comments, or we can talk about any of the books that you want to read along with me.

April’s Reads

Icarus Deception. 

Amazon | IndieBound | GoodReads

This book was a big YES to everything I feel about my own creative business, and the way I encourage creatives in their own. It directly inspired this post about the Only Work You Have to Do, whose discussion led to this one on connection…which led to these two posts about creating a path of connection for your customer.

Market Yourself.

Amazon | Goodreads

Yes, I spent a good chunk of last week re-reading my own book, to prepare for teaching a workshop on Artist’s Portfolios + Social Media. The timing was perfect since Saturday was my Book-iversary! The book launched one year ago! (You can get a signed one here.)

Sunday Morning Quilts

Amazon | IndieBound | GoodReads

I read a lot of quilt books last month, but this was by far the best – both in the I-would-make-that quality of the patterns and in the friendly, chatty beginning.

May’s To Read List 

I had intended to read Contagious last month…but I had to return it to the library (someone else had a hold on it) before I got to it. But it’s all mine now, and I’m one chapter in. What makes this book different from all the other ones about business and social media is that it is well-researched by the author.

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up is all about creative nonfiction. What it is, how to write it, and exercises to get you started. Since creative nonfiction is the best definition I can find for what I write, and I’m working on a new project, I’m super excited to read this.

After hearing Father Boyle on On Being with Krista Tippet, I wanted to read his book.  I strongly recommend the recording of their conversation. It’s funny, heart-breaking, and is the very best I can hope for my faith.

Lean In. Eh, I’m requested this book from the library because I’m curious about what it says to women in the workforce. I’ve seen a lot of entrepreneurial types saying “You don’t need to “lean in” because you should start your own business!“…but while I’d love for everyone to do exactly what they love, I know that’s not a choice everyone has, in every situation. Until I read this, I’m not recommending it, because it has the potential to be completely annoying.

Last week my 14 year old brother called me up to say, “I just finished Divergent. It is BETTER than the Hunger Games. You have  to read it.”  We’re going on a family vacation at the end of June, and since 14 year old boys are notoriously hard to have conversations with (without stabbing out my own eyes), I hope to be caught up with where he is in the series so we can talk about it. (Yes, I take recommendations from everyone. And I know we have similar taste (in movies and books, if not in video games.))

I’m an affiliate for Amazon + IndieBound, which means I get soy latte money if you buy through the links I’ve used here. GoodReads is a free tool for tracking what you read.  I  read all these books via my library, which I strongly recommend!

What are you reading? 

Ok, time for another un-awesome truth.

You know how I’m teaching 4 workshops in the next few days? Yeah, I’m nervous.

Although I teach all the time, I don’t often hold in-person workshops. On top of that, the Western North Carolina Art Councils are not my typical audience. Usually, when you come to one of my classes (in person or online) you already know me. You come because you’ve been reading this blog, or my book, or you get my emails. You have an idea of what you’re getting – a fast-talking, pink-haired, enthusiastic book nerd with a few too many pop culture references.

That’s because, like I’m always encouraging you to do, I fill my business with my Right People, and I focus all my energy on serving them. That means I am pretty much always surrounded by people who both get me and like me. But at these workshops, students aren’t coming because they know me, they’re coming because they’re HIA members and they want to learn the subject matter.

This tiny shift is monumental.
It means that, for the first time in a long time, I’m not already totally comfortable. I’m hesitant being my weird self. And the truth is, I debated with myself: is it better to focus solely on the self-selected Right People…or go outside my already-defined comfort zone and serve not-yet-my-Right People.

But even though I still have no idea how it will go, or if I’ll fail miserably, I am confident that this is the right thing to do. I know I need to wade out into unknown waters and try something new. Even if I bomb, I need to show myself that I can take the flawed, enthusiastic self and be fully ME in front of perfect strangers. I need to trust that what holds true with us, here, in the safe spaces I’ve built (on the blog, email, Twitter, and the Starship), will hold true in the Outside World. That openness, bravery, and exploration work for me all the time, and that business help that centers on defining your ideal business speaks to everyone.

Oh, I still stand by my assertion that you should focus your marketing energy on your Right People, 100% of the time. You don’t need to try to make yourself uncomfortable and scared. Life provides enough moments to be brave. But if an opportunity comes up for you to meet a whole new audience? One that you just don’t know about yet? Take it. Try it.

What Brave New Thing have you done lately? Let’s celebrate our bravery in the comments!

PS. Also, thanks to a tip from Alex, I’m using science to calm myself. I’m not nervous, I’m vibrating with anticipation! I’m not sweaty, I’m enthusiastic!

Dudes! Yesterday’s post has turned into a party, in the comments and on Twitter. If you’re feeling sad or lonely…read it!

Today, I have just a few quick things I wanted to tell you about.

1. Signed books! 

I have a few books left over from last summer. They’ve been sitting in my closet for months and just this week I realized – I could send them to you! Signed (if you like)! You see, when you order my book from my page, the publisher, or Amazon, it comes to you directly from the publisher. I don’t see or touch those books. But I got a box to take to a workshop in Seattle…and I still have a few left.

So! If you’d like a signed book, you can order it from me with this link.
You’re buying the book from me + I’m going to ship it to you myself, via USPS Priority Flat Rate envelope. It’s $26.95 + $5 for shipping (US only, if you’re international, I’ll email you to adjust the shipping).  When you check out, tell me if you’d like me to write something specific (perhaps it’s for a friend?)

The pages are filled with little asides and reminders, to keep things interesting. The book is written a lot like this blog – in my voice and style and jokes – but just better organized and with a zillion worksheets so you can take what you’re reading and apply it to your business. (People really seem to like it!)  I have 8 books and when they’re gone, they’re gone!

Click here to buy a signed book

2. Workshops in North Carolina

I am teaching 4  in-person workshops in the next week, as a teacher with Handmade in America. I’m super honored to be invited to be one of  their teachers, and delighted to hold my first workshop with them.  If you’re in the area and you want to come, you have to register ahead of time. If you’re a member, the workshops are free; if not, each is $20 (or you can join the Council at the workshop).  Each workshop is 2 hours long, and will include a lesson, worksheets and discussion. (I’ll be teaching different workshops in other counties in the fall, so sign up here if you want to hear about them)

Saturday, May 4th at the Surrey County Arts Council
10 am – Noon Artist’s Portfolo
1 pm – 3pm  Target Market
To register: arts@surryarts.org

Monday, May 6th at Ashe County Arts Council
3pm – 5pm Artist Portfolio
6 pm -8 pm Social Media for Beginners
To register, please contact the Arts Council at  (336)846-ARTS :: jane@ashecountyarts.org

3. Managing the growth of your business

Last week I wrote about post about how to handle those times of crazy-growth, when it seems we don’t have space for everything we need to do, over at OhMyHandmade.

4. Hilarity.

If you’re reading this via email, click through to laugh and laugh.

I just read this post about “boho perfectionism”, and seriously, you need to read it. (Now!)

It reminded me of the OMHG twitter chat last week where someone asked me (and Jessika) something along the lines of

“How do you have time to be so awesome?”

I answered with the truth:

“Because I spend most of my time being NOT awesome. I sleep in, read too much, watch 8 hours of the West Wing in a weekend. When I do work, I try very hard to do my BEST work. Not to look awesome, or do what I think you want me to do, but to do the things that  only I can do, the very best I can.”
So let’s clear the air here, ok? Let me be entirely honest about how this pink-haired, plant-powered empire (ha!) exists.

In order to have and do what I want, I have decided to not have and not do a whole whack of things that “normal” people do.

I only cook dinner once or twice a week (Jay is an amazing cook, so even though I love it, I’ve turned the kitchen over to him). We rarely eat out (only once this month!) unless we’re visiting family. I don’t have a “home office”, so if I’m working at home it’s at the kitchen table (which is in the only room – the “living room”) or on the couch. My usual “office” is whatever empty chair I can grab at Starbucks (the only coffeeshop in my town) or the library (next to the snoring-loudly homeless guy).

 In other words, I’m not living your fantasy of the awesome business owner. I’m also not living  ”boho perfection” in any other aspect of my life, no matter what those vegan dinners look like on Instagram.  

Sure, I do “healthy” stuff – I’m vegan, I’m training for a 5k, I strength train (love this app) and meditate/pray – but you know what? It’s not for my health. And it’s not because I’m particularly “good”. My veganism (which can be extremely unhealthy – did you know Oreos are vegan? YUM.) is compelled by compassion for animals and my complete disgust with factory farming. My exercise routine is entirely necessitated by my years-long mission to conceive children, without drugs or surgery. (Kate said this so well.) I meditate and pray because, well, I believe that’s the best way to listen in to the Creator, to guide my life towards more love + compassion (and less stress + trying-to-control-it-all).

But none of this is a sacrifice. None of this is “good” or “disciplined” or anything. I live this way because I (am trying to) let my values inform my actions. My values are compassion, freedom, and exploration. But yours are going to be different, so your Ideal Life will look different. You have to find YOUR deep-rooted desires and then make decisions for your life based on that.

At the same time, none of this is sad or whiny. I wouldn’t change anything – I want to live this way. But sometimes, when I see your beautiful living room, or adorable children, or organized studio, I forget a little.

I’m sharing all this because I want you to know – you can have a super-happy life, one filled with the things that matter to you.

But it might not look awesome from the outside. My mother-in-law is sad we don’t live in a nicer place. My mom thinks I work way too hard. My high school friends all own their house, and we’re years away from that.

But I alone am responsible for defining what I want, and then creating it. And (most days) I am deliriously happy. I am delighted with my life and the person I’m spending it with (and my dog!) and my business. Because it’s mine. Because I get to have pink hair and wear pink shoes and snuggle.

I want you to be happy, to have what you want. And I want you to know that it won’t come from lusting after someone else’s business or life you see on blogs, twitter or instagram. The first step is to define what you want. And then make sure you’re not being distracted by what you see in the comparison-chamber of the internet. And then look around: I bet you already have at least some of it. Your hair is great, your handknit shawl is beautiful, your business is beaming.

Let’s agree together to change the nature of how we interact with the jealousy-inducing images. Next time someone (or their life or their business) is looking particularly ”awesome”, look back around at your own life, not with comparison, but with gratitude. What are your values? What’s your personal style? How’s it reflected in your life, right now?

Wow! Tuesday’s post about creating a path of connection really touched on something, prompting emails + tweets from so many of you!

We’re all searching for a rhythm to interacting with our community, one that is sustainable for both sides, one that feels generous and friendly and doable. After spending the first months (or years!) of your business searching desperately to find your people, it take s a conscious shift to move into serving your people –  through your marketing and making – to stop pushing so hard and start looking around and talking with who’s there already.

But take note! Even if you’re in the very beginning stages of finding your People, you still need to think through the customer path, so that every new person who discovers you knows what to do next. This is part of the system you want in place as you begin to reach out to new customers.

Now that we have a path to bring interested readers closer, let’s talk about what happens after they commit to us, after they become a customer. The path doesn’t stop here, at the door of The Purchase, it can keep going deeper and deeper into your community. In other words, each of your products or services can act as a different part of the path – each one can deepen a relationship with your customer.

Like I said before, every path will look different. Even if you sell products online and never interact in the physical space of your customers, you can still create a path. Even if you only do craft shows in person, you can still create a path.

Here are some things to keep in mind as you lay your path

• Make it easy to start on the customer path. Have something available for the taste-tester. If I’m on your newsletter and open all your emails and am a fan of your work — how can I first support you? If you’re an artist – do you have affordable prints (or even notecards?) If you’re a teacher, do you have a book or PDF or email series?For some of your people, this will be the end of the path (even if they love you), but for others this will reassure them that they want to continue on the path with you, into bigger commitments.

• The more time or money commitment required by your product or service, the farther down the path it is. Offer this deeper commitment to people who have already invested in the relationship.

• If you make products, it may seem difficult to come up with further parts of the path. Brainstorm ideas that would either give the buyer more of your products over time, more of your personal time and attention, or a special access to treasured, limited editions.

• Guard your path. It’s easy to think we should offer everything we have to everyone who finds us – but this doesn’t serve you or them. It confuses a first-time buyer (or scares them off), and it throws your precious time into the hands of strangers. Instead, offer your deepest options to those already on the path – past customers, long-time readers, customers-who-have-become friends.

• This isn’t about keeping the wrong people out, this is about keeping your Right People engaged and interested. A clear path helps you and the customer know what to do next.

• Make it obvious. And then even more obvious. Don’t rely on your biggest fans to find your other offers, show it them clearly and with love. Make it perfectly obvious what they should do next if they want to enjoy even more of your work.

What’s your customer path look like? How do your products guide a reader into becoming a more invested buyer?

If you’re listening in to your people, and you’re fully showing up to connect with them, the next step is to make it easy for them to connect with you. While it’s true that having a host of option (blog, email, social media) gives your reader a lot of choices…it also triggers the paradox of choice. With too many equal options, people are more likely to choose nothing than to choose something. Not to mention, having too many equal options makes it hard for you to keep up with it all, which is oten “solved” by putting the same information everywhere, punishing those you follow you in more than one place, killing real connection.

It’s your job to create the path.

If you want to connect with readers and buyers, and help them find your work and make the decision to invest it, then you need to make it as easy as possible for them. You do this by suggesting what to do next, at every step. You do this by creating a path for the reader/buyer to follow.

This pathway of connection includes absolutely every way you interact with people who may or may not be your right people – your blog, email newsletter, social media, guest posts, sales pages, and (once they cross over into Right People territory and pay for something), your connection pathway continues through your products, classes, clubs, retreats.

Today we’ll talk a bit about creating a pathway of connection for your reader (before they buy, before they decide if they are one of your Right People), and tomorrow we’ll talk a bit about creating a path for your buyer.

Every path is different.

I can’t tell you what your path should look like. It’s going to be based on what works for you and on what your People use and read (I talk about choosing your tools in detail in Chapter 5 of the book.) But as you plot your path for your customers, here’s a few things to keep in mind:

• The first steps on your path are the easiest to do – reading one blog post, replying to one tweet. This is where the person very first becomes aware that you and your work exist. Next steps on the path require more commitment and more information.

• Honor this commitment your readers are making and the trust their putting in you. Honor it by giving them what they’ve signed up for. Respect the deeper commitment by matching it – create deeper content, invite them to specials, give them first sneak peek.

• Keep in mind who you’re writing for. A guest post is going to be seen by people who don’t know anything about you. A tweet may be read by new followers and old friends. An email to your newsletter list is read by people who have committed to hearing from you regularly, and who probably have already decided they like you and your work. Write for the specific audience.

• The farther people walk down the path, the closer they are coming to you. Since such a small percentage of people who read your blog or follow you on Twitter actually take the time to reply to you, treasure each response and give it your time and attention. In replying (or starting a conversation) this person is saying: Hey, I want to connect with you more, I want this to be a two-sided relationship. This is the best! These relationships are the bedrock of your business, so do whatever you have to do to make time for them.

• Make it easy for the reader to move down the path. Once you know the steps on your path, lay them out in order for your readers. Suggest the reader of your guest post visit your blog, tell your twitter followers about your newest post, ask your blog readers to subscribe, create an autoresponder to introduce new subscribers to your work , invite your subscribers to your newest product or service. It’s up to you to explain the path to interested readers, so don’t wait around for them to find it.(You do know I send special weekly lessons to explorers, right?)

• At the end of this path is a relationship, an equal exchange. This might be a sale (in which you exchange money for a product) or it might be a collaboration or even a real friendship. As you build your path and invite readers to the next step, remember this! Begin with the end in mind, and ask yourself if you want to say or do what you’re doing, if there was a true friend on the other end.

Let’s take a breather for a minute and acknowledge something. This is kind of scary. If you feel anxious or shy about talking about your Art, then it might be exceedingly uncomfortable to imagine this path, to imagine that you’re going to have more and deeper conversations. I think this is why so many people just  default to  ”I listed this” tweets or boring blog posts. It’s much easier to be boring and impersonal.

But there’s a huge upside – it’s much easier to invite real fans into your work. It’s much easier to talk to people who want to buy what you sell. And the only way to know they truly want it, is to give your fans a way to connect with it and you. I tell clients to look at their newsletter sign-up as a chance for the fans to speak up and say: I’m here! I want to know more!  It’s a service.
And here’s more good news – when your future customer is connecting to you in new ways, when you’re respecting their commitment and fulfilling it with your best work, you’ll see that you are both getting something out of the relationship. They’re not just giving you money for your art – they are enjoying the relationship. They are delighting in knowing you.

This pathway of connection comes up pretty often in Flight Plan sessions – if you’re feeling scrambly about launching your book or writing your newsletter, it’s likely that your pathway isn’t clear (to you or your people).  Finding time to make your art and connect is often as simple as clarifying your connection path and making it obvious to readers. I still have four spots left, if you’d like to one.

Last week we talked about the Real Work in your business: Make Art + Connect and Beka commented that it can be boiled down even further: Make art TO connect. I couldn’t agree more!

For many of us, making art is how we both connect with our inner selves, who we really are and what we really think, and how we  connect with the world. We learn to see the world, describe it, and share it with others through our Art. (Reminder: Art = what you make. From writing, to painting, to sewing, to teaching, to parenting, to practicing medicine – it’s all Art.)

But for lots of us introverts*, we have to make it a point to connect. We have to work at actually doing it, even when our art requires other people (like teaching or writing). It’s not a question of if you’re with another person, but if you’re really opening up to them, being brave and sharing who you are. For example, right now I’m writing in a coffeeshop packed with people, but I’m not connecting with any of them. When I work one-on-one with explorers, I have to practice opening up, truly listening, and being fully present during the whole hour, and in our email conversations before and after. I have to clear my mind and tune in.

Connection was my big lesson last year, and its intersection with art-making is one of my favorite areas of exploration. See, I spent years of my working life thinking, being inside my own head, and only venturing out when I needed something. It was my handmade business that first sparked my curiosity about why other people do what they do. And soon I realized that dedicating time to learning that (via real conversations) was the best thing I could do for business.

I started to explore this intersection of connection and art in my book, where we dive deep into understanding the person on the other end of the transaction: Who is she? What does she want? Why is she buying what you’re selling?…after we get clear on you and your Art.  In the book (and in all of my work) I insist that you know the answers to those questions better than anyone else.  How? Your connection. Your conversations. Being open and listening in.

Here’s a partial list of what learning-through-connection requires:

Presence. Are you there? Or thinking about 50 other things? (This is why it’s hard to connect on Twitter – you’re absorbing a firehose of information all at once, from a zillion people).

Openness. Are you waiting to say what you want to say? Are you open to being wrong?

Patience. You don’t get to know anyone in one conversation. It takes many conversations, over a long period time to learn what makes someone do anything.

Curiosity. Good news – people are fascinating! Be interested in what makes them act, and you’ll be endlessly absorbed.

What else is required to connect with your People?

* If you wanna learn more about the wonderfulness of introverts (and how to work with or parent an introvert), you gotta read Quiet, by Susan Cain.